Geoff sent me a link, which is his way of saying, *Darling, I was thinking of you today and I want you to know you are my inspiration. Here is something interesting I want to share with you. Read it, and later this year let's get together and talk about it.* I know him that well.

The link is to an article about writing. You can read it, then let's get together and talk about it.
*Writing is Good*

I am debating whether to say a few flippant remarks about life and then play Dynomite, or say straight out that I still feel in a funk. At what point are we meant to say "uncle?" I have sufficient intelligence to realize that I must get passed regrets and disappointment and accept the present circumstances. I know that life is full of setbacks and challenges; been there, done that, coped and moved on. So, what's up with my funky self now? What's different? Why are the challenges so defeating? I would seriously like to learn more about what I think are the demoralizing affects of feeling like a disconnected nomad. I write all of this at the risk of sounding alarming. I feel like I am managing pretty good under the circumstances and I am not utterly despondent, but there is a huge gap, between where I am and where I want to be and I can't seem to bridge it.

I have been invited to see an altar. It is an altar to "what you want to bring in to your life." You know, I think right now my house is like an altar to what I have already brought in to my life. It reflects my cluttered, muddled, out of balance, faithless funk. Oh dear. All kinds of philosophies, excuses, rationales and questions are brewing in my mind... mid-life crisis, depression, more vitamins, less Martha S., uppers, downers, strong black coffee, chickens, drive to Mexico, shave, maybe it's my deodorant, maybe I should strictly avoid neighborhoods with 2007 Escalades, designers, hair extensions, lipo and life coaches?

My house should reflect family, our family, our laughing, creative, supportive family. My house should reflect my interests, like gardening and cooking, painting, reading, sewing, connecting to family and friends. My house should reflect the gratitude I feel for having shelter and opportunity, a full pantry, clean socks. My house should be clean. I should clean my house... wow, what an epiphany! And maybe my house should have an altar, or I could build one in my heart, but I just don't know what I would put there. (How about a dustbuster and some elbow grease?)

The best news of the week: Max is reading. He made a dream come true for me, when he sat in his bed, propped up by his new pillow and with the reading light his Oregon grandparents sent, and he read an entire book. He read it happily and he felt the cognitive, spiritual *a-ha* of reading joy. We knew it was coming, that he'd find a way, but he didn't know it was possible and he was losing interest fast, and he has his extra challenges, so this is an especially treasured success.

You know, I could erase the rest of my rant-whine and just reflect on Max's success. He is an inspiration. I like Chickenblog to be an honest and complete reflection of life and details, even when it's sad or gritty, then the successes and joys are all the sweeter.

Ahhhk! That's the sound I make when I am juggling on a tightrope, blindfolded, drunk and somewhat dazed. I think every few months I make some comment about the date... as in: OMG I can't believe it's January 17th! Or how about the fact that this is 2007. I'm still writing 2006 on checks, I discovered today. What's up with France and Britain joining forces? Fritain? Anyway, I am here and feeling overwhelmed and a bit punchy. I am aware that school culture has completely taken over what little remained of my thought processes. Someone didn't do the dishes or write my friends thank you cards for salvaging my birthday. I am out of touch, desperately in need of exfoliation and an extreme make-over. Really, feel free to nominate me for the Baggy Lady Miracle Overhaul and Ass-Kicking. I alternate between my one pair of jeans and the skirt that was meant to be "singularly beautiful," and not "singularly the only thing I wear besides my jeans."

All randomness and whining aside, my kids are amazing and fill me with awe and wonder, so I will carry on, and Geoff... he is amazing. Geoff is a guiding light, a force of goodness and will. And now I am going to help with homework.

Once a Year

Dominic knows where the power is...


Once a year, when I watch football, I enjoy it. I think I will enjoy the Superbowl even more if the Chargers are in the game.
For a more informed, dedicated fan's perspective please contact Holly or James.

Pass the nachos.

Three seasons. Three places.
Can you guess where in the world these came from?




I won't keep you in suspense any longer. The first image comes from the Island of Hawaii, where Tutu and Grampa Corm have built a beautiful home, with maturing trees and two cats that roam from sunrise 'til supper. They hung a reflection ball in the banyan tree.

The second picture is a prize winning photograph, first prize actually, and it comes from Oregon. Grandma BooBoo submitted her photograph of the trail at Sweet Creek to the Oregon Coast Photographers' Association. She may call herself a "point and shoot" photographer, but I think she's masterful.

And too bad we aren't on the Oregon coast right now, then we could be playing in the snow in Grandma BooBoo and Grampa Ron's front yard. I don't know how rare snowfall is where they live. I do know they were enjoying the beauty of it.

Today I received my very first "I love you mom," from Maria. Only, it sounded something like: "I wov-ee you mom." It was spontaneous and sweet and made me feel LOVED. She has taken to making toasts. Anything cylindrical will do for a cup. She just used a checker piece, which she tapped against my checker piece and said "Chee-o," which means "cheers." Then we took dainty sips from our tiny cups. And we toasted again, sipped, sighed, toasted, sipped, sighed. Good stuff.

We were all having breakfast when she declared her love for me.
Then Alex asked Maria, "Do you love mommy?"
"Ya, uh-huh, wov-ee, wov-ee, wov-ee." Maria threw some more love around the room.
Max wanted some: "Do you love Max, Maria?"
"Uh-huh. Wov-ee Maa," she replied.

What happened next was slightly less adorable. In the parking lot at school she went in to full melt down mode. It was loud, and wet, and all absorbing of her senses and limbs. She flailed when I held her, she wailed when I consoled her. We drew a small, very sympathetic crowd. Teachers and parents, students, a lot of people know Maria and they were surprised and concerned to see her crying. First grader, Michaela asked her "What's wrong?" Her mom, Betty, was able to give her a small hug. Ms. Rachel called out to Maria from where the middle school was saluting the flag, "Maria why are you sad?" "She never cries," two teachers remarked to each other. Maria made a sigh, the sound of which seemed to release her grief, and she waved to everyone calling "Good-by, good-by."

I wov-ee Maria too.

Let's play with Google's translator. First English to Spanish, then back to English. Please ready aloud for maximum amusement:

"And here we are tomorrow of Christmas. We were for above in 6 and now it is almost noon. Maria still has gifts no opened. She is occupied piling up of the boxes of the light that came from their Tutu and Grampa Corm. Geoff has been who mounted and of reading of instructions from dawn. Alex constructed a dragoon already. Guillermo still is using his shirt of superman. The Maximum took to its transport its site and it has probably everything in sequence now. And I? I am trying to share it everything with you, the aunts and the uncles and the cousins and the friends and grandmas and grandpas, because the only thing that could be ed ***reflx mng tomorrow of Christmas more would be tenerte with us here. Thanks for the national geographic subscription, books and the CDes, for the collection ducky of rubber and the new cloth of the table, the sweater for Maria and the pretty wood marks (I have put pictures in them already) He is not everything on the presents, by all means. I am enchanting the collective alcohol, love and the will that east day drives of celebration and maintains the tradition and the joy to us together. La Paz May and the aclamation is with you everything with the New Year."

Guillermo and I are rolling.

How do I manage it? How do I take simple tasks and botch them utterly and completely? This is a very bad day for Life to prove my incompetence, again.
I went to the template to add a new link. I've done it before, but today my programming skills made a mess of my links... I cannot understand why it should be so, except that Life is petty that way sometimes. I have two options, no, maybe three...

1. finish the bottle of wine Holly brought
2. Drop off Hans and Gretchen's Christmas presents before it's Easter
3. Crawl back to bed.

I found an interesting piece of mail this morning from Allison. She has a site about chickens: "Chicken Video..." another kind of Chicken Blog Some of you may recall that Chickenblog began when we were Jolly Green Ranchers, living in the country with our chickens and a tractor. I write about many subjects, but those 3 chicas and Sunshine, the surprise rooster, were always a source of happiness. Life takes many turns, the chicas are long gone, but some day I hope Chickenblog will return to the farm or to some rooftop city garden with free ranging city hens. The timing of Allison's email is interesting, because the chicas have been on my mind quite a bit. Going through the archives, I've had plenty of opportunity to remember how much joy and wonder those chicas gave me. This is a reflective time of year for me, when I am wondering about my life and how I am living it, and yesterday I was daring myself to go buy some chicks. We can't have hens now, not here. Sigh. Allison sells a bumper sticker that reads: "Wherever chickens are outlawed, only outlaws will have chickens." Tempting.

2006 Reflections

I wanted to create a sentimental journey of 2006, but this may only serve to prove that a year cannot be summed up in 12 photographs. Maybe I should add a few more... we've been very busy, we've seen lots of family and friends and many memorable moments should never be forgotten.


January is full of birthdays, including Ron's, Nick's, Tamsyn's, Kelsey's, Janice's and Geoff's. Geoff's 40th birthday we celebrated at the park and with lots of friends and family. It was a beautiful day, especially for January.


Maybe So Cal is always beautiful. Here it is in February and the weather was just fine for Max to climb his favorite tree. We had to make a rule about how high he could climb. Max is always ready and willing to go one branch higher.


William's and Rich's weren't the only birthdays to celebrate in March, because at long last there was a new baby in the family.
Here is little Isabella Rose.


It's April and the weather is still grand! Good enough for a long weekend of camping with our friends Tamsyn, Carol and Gene. It's funny how even a little escape can make for so much fun.


My Mom makes the long trip to see us a few times every year, and on this trip we made a surprise visit to see Grandmother for Mother's Day. Another occasion with lasting memories.


June is a month full of birthdays, like Delia's, Hans', Bill's, Julie's, Phil's and Alex's. I took the children on a Monterey Roadtrip, which we filled with stops at Hearst Castle, Big Sur, Morro Bay, Santa Barbara and even a day at Bill and Alison's. By this time Geoff was getting his feet wet at his new job, and now he's way overdue for one of our awesome roadtrips.


Being busy at work doesn't mean missing all the summer fun. Geoff made it to ComicCon with us. We met Ray Harryhaussen, and saw a lot of strange and interesting characters.


I think Max really impressed me this year with his bright attitude and maturity. He turned 8 in August and he's been doing very well at school, at home, with friends and family.


Don't Ruth and Corm look happy? Grandchildren all around; I think that's how they like it. For Alex and Max it was a last week of freedom before they started their first year of school away from home.


This picture comes a little late in the photo-calendar, and Dominic came a little early, but what a welcome arrival! By October we were fully immersed in school schedules and activities, otherwise we would have rushed to meet the newest cousin.


November is another busy month, with Thanksgiving and holiday anticipation, but for me it's all about this little girl. Maria turned two and we are all marveling at her new skills and amusing antics.


Finally, I get to meet my nephew Dominic. It's hard to choose just one image to represent the last month of a great year. Holding this baby was such a great feeling, I think the memory sums up the joy I feel at Christmas.

That's 12 pictures for 12 months. There is a lot more to remember, like swimming at Steve and Andi's, welcoming Hans home from his time abroad, scrumptious dinners at James and Deanne's, Geoff's international job search, house hunting, our move, Maria learning to walk, Alex wininng two LEGO building contests, our new kitty... What do you remember about 2006?

News Form Our Winter Break...

An update: Geoff saved the archives! I don't know how, except that it took many hours, and now the archive links work again. Now I am working to update the archive photos. The old photos were linked to the old domain name and have to be individually switched to our new domain. Remember our old *privacy* system for pictures? Obviously I've thrown that security issue out the window, but a lot of pictures are still secure, so if you are exploring in the ancient archives you can plug in "balboa park" for the username and password. Okay, the updating is going s l o w. Geoff is better at it because he doesn't stop to read every entry. I am almost through July of 2003.


Here is the Santa that Maria kisses. She enthusiastically waves hello and good-bye to the little guy by our front gate. And in her arms is her other sweetheart, Frosty, the plush doll her Grandma Boo-Boo left her for Christmas.

Last night I was feeling comfortable and content, when I suddenly remembered this is our last week of winter break. It occurred to me that I really love having all the children at home. I love that the rules, expectations, impositions and chores of School are slipping from my memory, and our own family rhythm is taking over. School culture is very consuming and for us, it's still foreign. At least we have this break. I wish Geoff had a break. His work is all consuming too, and this morning, with rain coming down, and new toys to be played with, Geoff has to leave us and go to work. Sigh. If I were benevolent leader of the world we would have 4 day weekends, 6 hour work days, health coverage for all, nap time, peace on earth and 10 weeks of paid vacation. More on this later.

Happy birthday Debbie! My Colorado cousin and I share the distinction of having post Christmas birthdays. Debbie I hope you are enjoying a very nice birthday with all the trimmings.

Holly has a pre Christmas birthday, which she celebrated with grace and good humor. Rich organized a surprise party for Holly, which I think worked... she looked surprised when she walked in to the pizza place and found friends and family waiting to fete her with pizza, beer, balloons, presents and cake. Here she is radiating wit and beauty...



And for no particular reason, here is picture of our kitty, Benjamin Franklin Thunder Cat, cowboy and explorer:

Merry Christmas!

Can I share Christmas Eve first? We were with Holly, Izzy, Nick and Rich last night, and we had a great time. It's so nice to arrive at their home, where everything looks so festive and beautiful. We did a lot, including watching the Chargers win one more, and watching Izzy try to crawl. We were fed what has become a favorite tradition: Holly's Hot Enchiladas! She can cook. What a treat. And there were gifts to exchange. Great Grandma Nancy always seem to know just what children will love. William loves his Superman gear, Maria loves her penguin, Max loves his football kicking game... Izzy and Maria looked adorable in their matching holly dresses. We can't wait to try Geoff's boogie sled on some mountain snow. I'm trying to sum it all up, which really isn't possible, so just think of laughter and anticipation, happy children, pretty lights, and the contentment we can have when we are with family, safe and thankful.










And here we are Christmas morning. We were up at 6 and now it's nearly noon. Maria still has unopened gifts. She's busy stacking lighthouse boxes that came from her Tutu and Grampa Corm. Geoff has been assembling and reading instructions since dawn. Alex already built a dragon. William is still wearing his Superman shirt. Max took his haul to his room and probably has it all in order by now. And me? I'm trying to share it all with you, with aunts and uncles and cousins and friends and grandmas and grandpas, because the only thing that could make Christmas morning more fun would be to have you here with us. Thank you for the National Geographic subscription, the books and CDs, for the rubber ducky collection and the new table cloth, the sweater for Maria and for pretty wood frames (I've already put pictures in them!) It's not all about the presents, of course. I am delighting in the collective spirit, love and good will that propels this holiday and keeps us together in tradition and joy. May the peace and cheer be with you all through the new year.

Light

Our children by candle light. The eve before Christmas Eve.
We still haven't found our stockings, but we are singing carols,
making plans and loving the season, especially with Geoff home today.

Grandma and all in Pasadena are well and we had a very good time visiting them.

Thank you to everyone that has sent us Christmas greetings. Your cards and pictures are hanging on our wall and it's cheering to see them and to know you were thinking of us. We are thinking of you too.