Thursday, March 25, 2004

Tuesday, March 23, 2004

Whuts write: Having smart gurlfrends that stay in touch. Holly 'xplanyed it all to me:

Subject: "An e-mail that's NOT selling you sex enhancers, mortgages, or weight loss... Do you know why most spam e-mail is rife with spelling and grammatical errors? (Do you? do you?) It's another evil trick spammers use to get around anti-spam filters, which are often designed to recognize certain words and phrases. So, the pond-scum who flood our e-mail accounts with their unwanted crap will insert random characters and words into the subject line."

Subject: "Get a big xxx on low-rate mortgage Prozac while losing wait..." from Anne, who is suggesting we delve in to some flower therapy. She's back from a rejuvenating weekend, and full of good ideas.

I was enjoying smug satisfaction in believing that I could spell and write more gooder than all them spammers and African dignitaries with Swiss bank account tie ups. Turns out they are pretty darn near genius.
What's wrong:

A subcutaneous goliath is pushing it's way to the surface of my face. It calls out in a foreboding drawl: "I am a large pimple, and I will emerge in time for Thursday's dinner party where you will sit in bright light and in close proximity to beautiful people." Perhaps the pimple will detract attention from the swollen mosquito bites I have been exhibiting on my face.

I have reached the outer limits of my computer skills, and unless I spend 9 weeks in a community college seminar, I may never get to free up more memory for iMovie, or resolve the mystery of not being able to access private images on Chicken Blog. Not sure which is more depressing: My dependancy on email, the internet, and iMovie/iDVD, or my ignorance of computer maintenance + lack of resolve to change.

My resolve to stay home has slipped, again. We're flying to Chicago and driving to Wisconsin. I want to BE there, but flying is not my sport. Really, really do not like to fly. Don't like to think about flying. Must think of something other than flying...

I can't dance.

There's a recurring smell at the front door. It's not a good smell. We don't know the cause.

On average, 9 out of 10 emails I receive are for antidepressants, sex enhancers, mortgages, and weight loss pills. Sometimes I want to proofread and correct them.