Do you spy Santa?
This is Maria's last day of school before winter break. Only, it's not, because I am keeping her home. She finished projects and finals already, so today was going to be a fun day, and yesterday could have been a fun day. But someone close to her is home with COVID, including his young family. Another school, down the street, is actually totally closed, because so many of their staff and teachers have COVID, they couldn't operate. We have been notified of 11 confirmed cases, and that was only yesterday. Alex, Bambi, and I spent hours searching the county for test kits, for a test site. I like to speak eloquently, to write thoughtfully, but really I just feel like blurting angrily, "I am so tired of this shit!" Inelegant, but honesty has it's own merits that can eclipse niceties.
She wants to be at school. She really wants to see that favorite teacher, be in his class, for the last time. She's already lost an entire semester of Japanese, and the trip to Japan. One and a half years at school, around friends. She isn't belaboring these things, the setbacks, the challenges. She doesn't get overwrought, but the toll is real. I hope, in writing these things down, that someday we will look back and reflect... Hey, Maria, that was a significant event, and it changed things, made life strange and uniquely challenging, but we found ways to overcome, even to thrive, and we had gains, accomplishments, and happiness, too. I want her to know that we see the struggle, her effort, her worry and disappointment. I won't downplay and refute any of the hard stuff. She deserves our concern, and respect. I feel this way for all of our children, all of the students, teachers, the custodians, and nurses, the lab techs, waiters, cooks, and delivery drivers. I am sorry this has been so hard, so unnecessarily hard, and strange. I see you.