Tuesday, March 01, 2011
William: "Are you going to post a bunch of pictures of me?"
He is slightly anxious.
Me: "This one? You look good. I could crop it..."
I am aglow with maternal pride, choosing my words for a birthday post. What can I say? How do I express it all? The love, the wonder, the journey...
William: "No. Uh, not that one."
Me: "Okay. How about this one, you're holding Tesla."
William: Mumbles a reluctant word of uncertain approval.
My mom scanned a photograph of William and shared it with us. He and I are cheek to cheek. He was a few months old, and I was not much older... the mommy me, that is. It was all brand new, but never unfamiliar. I felt like his mommy from the first.
He made it so easy. I am, and always have been in awe of him. I love him. He makes it so easy.
And now. Now is here, and the days and moments, the lessons we've shared, the triumphs and challenges of twenty years are these real, yet surreal experiences that I cannot believe have happened.
It's a strange sensation... I am there, in that moment of holding William in my arms, and he is mine and I know his needs and I marvel at all that he is absorbing, all that he is projecting, and I am here, now... seeing him a young man, negotiating with him, marveling at who he is, what he can do. Time is not linear... William you taught me this, and more, in many different ways. I am so thankful to have been on this journey with you. I will always see you from every moment, mine, ours, and your own. Somewhere along this journey you have become your own, and it amazes and delights me.
Happy birthday William.