Friday, May 07, 2021
A Friend to Many
This morning I learned something very sad... sudden and sad. Teresa Kasner passed away, just yesterday. It was unexpected, and I cannot imagine the shock and grief her family, and friends must be in. Her dear friend, Betsy, reached out to Teresa's blogging friends, on Dayle's behalf. Dayle was Teresa's husband of 51 years. Teresa called him Chef Dayle, when sharing the many dishes he fixed, the breakfasts, lunches and dinners, and Teresa always made them look and sound amazing, even a sandwich was appreciated and extolled in her posts. I am going to miss reading about those meals, because through something "everyday," she reminded me of the love and care we receive in even simple things, and to take notice, celebrate those gestures and moments. Teresa could make anything a noteworthy thing, and celebrated each day, and every person, all occasions, with grateful, admiring intent. She was a new friend to me, and I am already changed and inspired by her life, by her bright perspective, her many talents, and how she seemed to possess endless energy for raising people up, seeing the best in a flower, a view, a jadeite vase. Not only did she comment on my blog, leaving me her signature ((hugs)), sharing a bit of herself, and engaging with me, she would also email me, to go in depth on subjects, like goats, and crochet, offering encouragement, and practical support. Did I mention the endless energy? She posted regularly, often, and it was always something fresh, something full of her interest and enthusiasm, whether she was rearranging her beloved jadeite pieces, making another holiday display, or celebrating a grandchild, a new flower blooming, on an adventure with her husband, she put her whole heart and convictions into her blog, into her life. She was an artist, in many mediums, and an active, enthused member of her community, and I am heartbroken as I think on all of the ways she will be missed... on how much I will miss her.
It's customary to annotate our relationship to someone, how we know them, like a qualifier, as though we are ranking our position, or implying the relationship is conditional. I would have said, "My blogging friend," until now. But, now I think of it, I don't feel like just a blogging friend, and I as I think of all of my blogging friends, I feel keenly that so many of those friendships are too dear, too meaningful to qualify, to make smaller than they feel to me. Teresa was a generous friend, an inspiring friend. Even the distance between our homes, her in Oregon, along the Columbia River Gorge, and me in Southern California, didn't feel so great. When I discovered that Teresa had a role in Vista House, just one of the beautiful and treasured experiences I have enjoyed in Oregon, I felt the distance shrink. I took her invitation to heart, and was looking forward to her offer of a personal tour of Vista House... I wouldn't have hesitated to accept any chance to know her better, to spend more time with her. I imagine all of her many friends, and especially her family, are wishing for more time in her sweet company. I hope her husband, and family, find comfort in knowing that her memory is dear to many, that so many of us celebrate and honor her memory, and are grieved to lose her. She is remembered, admired, appreciated, loved. Dayle finding her a good deal on more pieces, and the two of them bringing home something new. I will miss her regular posts, news, updates, her uplifting spirit. I will miss the anticipation of someday meeting Teresa in person, of seeing her newest crochet project... and more, but just now, I am feeling another wave of shock and disbelief. like the ones I remember when I was first getting to know her. I don't want to remove her name from the list of bloggers that I visit, but it will be a painful reminder to see more and more days pass, and no news from lovely Teresa Kasner. And. It will be hard to know that I won't hear from her, won't have another of her thoughtful comments, a ((hug)), some of her uplifting words, and kindness. So many friends will be missing her comments, her good spirit.
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What a moving post. I found your post from a link in Teresa's sidebar as I grazed for any information or insight into her sudden passing. Many years ago we found each other in Blogland through the Attic 24 crochet blog and she never failed to leave a lovely comment on my blog. I also loved seeing her updates and was so shocked this morning to read of her passing. She taught me to look for the joy in each day and I will miss her. I agreed with your sentiments that we haven't lost a blogging friend, but we've lost a beautiful FRIEND. xox Louise
Thank you Natalie.. this Teresa's husband Dayle, your thoughts on Teresa's passing mean a lot to me.
Oh my goodness, Natalie. Thank you so much for visiting my blog. Thank you for this beautiful tribute to Teresa. You have my crying again. She was an absolutely bright spot in this world and I will miss her so much. She was so faithful in her blogging, sharing, visiting, commenting, emailing, responding. I will miss my interactions with her. I just can't believe she's gone. Thank you for voicing what we all feel so lovingly. Hugs and blessings to you.
Sorry for the sudden loss of your friend, Natalie. I only "knew" her through her comments on CB, but I thought she seemed like a really lovely, joyful person. I had missed seeing her comments recently. You left a touching tribute.
What a wonderful tribute to Teresa and it's all the things I wan to say. I so upset by the suddenness of this. She seemed as if she had rallied at home. I'm just so at a loss. She was a dear dear person with a heart of gold.
Louise, like you, I was visiting other blogs, looking for insight, for more of her friends, because I needed to do anything I could to connect with Teresa, to feel her community, even to try and make some sense of this incomprehensible passage. What I have found, and it's no surprise, is a lot of shock, and grief, and a lot of friends! She was as true and good as she seemed, and everywhere I find those friends who can't think of anything but her joy, her light, her generosity. We were so fortunate to have been noticed by her, to have engaged with her, and that's a blessing, and a comfort, and it also adds to the poignancy of the loss we feel. I am sorry... sorry, sad, and bewildered.
Oh! Dayle, I checked for comments all day, and every time I did that, it dawned on me.. Teresa would have been the most likely to leave a comment, and this realization would bring a new wave of terrible sadness, and incredulity. I have received condolences for my loss, and they have been kind words, and I appreciate them, but most of all they turn my thoughts to you, your children and grandchildren. It is such a tremendous testament to Teresa and the incredible impact she made on my life that I feel a loss, that I grieve, and it underscores for me just how terrible your loss is. I am more sorry than I can say, and all of the sympathy I have received I forward, in my thoughts and prayers, to you and your family... for comfort, with tremendous respect, and solace. I am so glad, honored, that you replied... and I gasped when I saw her name pop up. The Internet is a strange, intangible space, but Teresa made so many of us feel close, familiar, and connected. Thank you for reaching out to us.
Tammy, hugs and blessings to us all... all of us who had even a brief encounter with Teresa, because she was that impactful, that bright a light! It didn't take long to feel her warmth, to see her light. And, like you, I am crying... over and over, again. We have lost too much, and feeling this way makes me feel at an utter loss to think how much sadder it has to be for her family. Oh, this is too hard to believe. Take care! "What would Teresa do," keeps popping into my head, and I think I know it means I can remember try to carry some of her light, and let it shine. I like to think she gave a lot of us some light we can shine.
Thank you, Ruth. You noticed, her regular comments! And you are so right... she was a lovely, joyful person.
So many of us, that "only" knew her through her blog, are reeling, shocked. And I feel, in a way, selfish, thinking of how much I am going to miss her posts, her comments, and emails. She gave a lot, to many. I would marvel at her... how many people she was engaging with, impacting, and then in "real" life, I could see she was even more connected, loving, appreciative. Oh, damn... we are so lucky to love and be loved, and it hurts so much to lose.
TahoeGirl, isn't that true! I felt just the same, that she was rallying, and now it's all terrible and shocking. I think she was so spirited, so vibrant, that it is inconceivable for her to be gone. And weren't we lucky to know her, but then, too, it makes losing her all that much more sad.
this is a beautiful tribute to a woman I loved and admired. Thank you for posting it. Such sadness.
How beautifully you have written about Teresa. I recognised her instantly from everything you said. Such a warm and friendly and genuinely wonderful woman. I am so sad to say goodbye to her.
Oh so moving and full of so much love. Our dear friend my only commenter and frequent email buddy will be so missed. Thank you for such a lovely post ⚘😔
Oh, Natalie - I'm so sorry for your loss and that of everyone who loves her and will miss her. Like Ruth, I enjoyed her thoughts in your comments. She is and will be missed.
I just finished reading Dayle's announcement this morning and then I clicked on your blog (which I started following because of Teresa) and read your beautiful tribute to her. It's such a sad morning to know that she is gone.
Dear Mereknits, thank you. Meeting her friends, through these messages and tributes, is feeling like another gift from Teresa! The fact that we are seeking each other out, and sharing our fond memories of her, feels like such a beautiful reflection of what she created and inspired. The more I think of how lucky she makes me feel, the sadder I feel that she is gone.
Dear CJ, thank you. I love that we all have been sharing and confirming this same story, painting this same picture of Teresa, because it is all so true and universal. We all saw her... beautiful, joyful, kind, thoughtful, sincere, talented. We can pour our hearts out describing her, because she was a genuine and vivid being, and saying goodbye is the only hard part. I am thankful for everyone sharing about her so we can, at least, hold her in our hearts.
Dear Wendy, like you, I feel like I have lost a dear friend, because Teresa so generously extended herself through our blogs, in email. Weren't we lucky? I will always cherish what she gave, and what she inspired... I hope to never forget to pay it forward. ((hugs))
Thank you, Janece. You and I know how special a friendship can be... even one through a blog! What Teresa achieved and nurtured, face to face, and virtually, is remarkable. It makes me feel a shift in culture, in my ideas about connecting and friendship... that we can have meaningful, lasting, and beautiful interactions at any distance. I am far less inclined to believe that a "blog friendship" is any less meaningful than one that is face to face. More ((hugs)), and more appreciation for all of my friends!
Dear LilysGrannie, hello! And thank you. I agree, it is a sad morning, still. Teresa is amazing... was amazing. It's somehow even harder to fathom that she is gone, when we are all talking about her, sharing our admiration, our shared experiences of being inspired by her, and connected with her. I keep wanting to tell her how great she is, and hoping she understood, in some way, that she was making so many of us feel special. She really did live beautifully.
Thank you for such a moving tribute to Teresa. I followed her faithfully for years as I have with you. Such a lovely circle of blogging friends and I enjoy all of them. I shall miss her posts more than words can express and my heart goes out to that family that she loved so much. Your tribute captured her true essence and made me weep for what we will miss. Thank you Natalie!
Thank you, Cynthia. It's hard to be confronted with this simple truth, that even someone as eternal and lively as Teresa can be gone, and when it happens this suddenly it is even harder to comprehend. And you are so right about her family, how much we are already missing her really makes it hard to imagine what this means for Dayle, her children, her grandchildren, and so our hearts ache even more, for them.
Thank you for being a familiar name and voice, here. Blogging isn't much without someone engaging, responding, and I am thankful for every friend that's dropped by. It's difficult thinking of what the future of these kinds of personal blogs will be when the very best bloggers have left us.
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