Blogging gives me many feelings, sensations, notions. Writing, and sharing, can be like sitting alone in my feelings, talking aloud, maybe a bit like running around and throwing off articles of clothing... exposed, in other words.
Well. Whether publishing my deep thoughts and other musings makes me feel exposed, or elated, mildly amused, or like an acclaimed correspondent, I accept full responsibility and all of the consequence of my emotions, self-doubt, mild amusement, over-exposure, and/or mediocrity. I tread this path voluntarily, willingly, unceasing!
I miss Teresa, which I hope won't be construed as an utterly selfish thing to say. But I suppose my reasons could seem selfish, because I miss her comments on this blog, and the emails we exchanged. I would have met her, I know, at the Vista House. She invited me to let her show me around there. She knew it well, and I was looking forward to meeting her. She'd become such an inspiring role model for me. She reminded me to keep a postive outlook, to keep busy, to keep moving forward. I was always astonished at how much she was into, planning, and had already accomplished! Her engagement was motivation to recommit to blogging, and to looking forward. She's someone I think of when I feel low, or like I don't make a difference... her words, her enthusiasm come to mind, and I hear in my head, What would Teresa Kasner do? It shakes me up, realigns me. I am glad I had the pleasure and good fortune of, even briefly, exchanging ideas and kindnesses with her.
Just now I was going to start the next blog post about this big trip we were on, and I have been enjoying writing all of it down, processing my thoughts and memories. But I heard a voice of doubt, and second guessed my intentions. I won't stop these posts, but just for today, I am giving it a rest. I'll be right back at it, no doubt! And in the meantime, maybe someone will ask... What else did you do? Did you go any place weird, or kitschy? Have you had enough of Portland, or have you already started planning how to get back? Do you really think you would move there, and how many houses would you need?