Thursday, April 24, 2008

So Many Deep Thoughts

I am all about the deep thoughts. Unfortunately they are so deep and unwieldy they defy articulation, expression, reason. In other words if I bother to post today, I risk being obtuse, dull, random and simply confusing. Ah, but I am going to post anyway. (insert maniacal laugh) To counter the effects of my unformed philosophies, I will include snapshots of beautiful flowers, which were a gift from my visiting Virginia friend, Carol L..

Carol was in town for just 2 days, so I was delighted she found time to spend a few hours with us. The children were disappointed that Tamsyn could not come, and by all accounts Tamsyn was very disappointed as well. I know I should say all supportive things about them living in Virginia and making the best and most of their circumstances, but it sure would be nice if the world would adjust and shift and make it possible for them to return to California. The children miss their best friend. I miss our friends too.

My pants smell bad. I suppose I should own more than one pair of pants, which get washed once a week, whether they need it or not and clearly, they do need it. Now that was a fine example of why I should be doing anything else beside writing my thoughts at this moment. Just be relieved I am not writing down all of my thoughts. The solution is obvious at least. I will put on my skirt, the other half of my wardrobe, and throw these jeans in the wash. I wish all of our other issues had solutions as simple and obvious as this.

I am tempted to list all of the issues we grapple with and post them here for your review. You could tell me whether they smell bad and offer solutions... the solutions I am not seeing, don't recognize, refuse to accept or am too disoriented to appreciate. I am tempted, but I am not compelled. One thing I have finally learned is that for every issue there are many solutions and even more opinions about which is the best solution.

Have you ever noticed you agree with whoever most closely expresses what you already believed in the first place? On the other hand, I am always a little alarmed at how easily I can be persuaded of one idea or another, and then switch back when I hear a new angle. The net result is that there is little or no point in soliciting the free advice and earnest opinions of concerned citizens. You can breath a sigh of relief now.

Geoff came home, late (is it really necessary for me include "late?" It goes without saying.)... he came home and said he did some investigating and confirmed that we can have chickens, as backyard pets, in our community. 10 chickens in fact. 10 is a lot of chickens. He added, for further emphasis, that in some neighborhoods we could have 25 chickens.
And what should I make of this?
So, I asked whether I could go to the country right now and bring home an actual chicken, and he said,
"Sure, if it will turn everything around for you, I will deal with the landlord."
Hmmm. I wonder.
Would a chicken, a plucky hen, turn everything around?
That seems like a tall order for a chicken. It's been almost 5 years since I had chickens and in that time I have probably romanticized the whole idea of chickens... but only just a little. And while my heart and soul pine for chickens, I think I know better what it all really means. I want the liberty of creating our own space, of settling in, like a hen on her nest, in her yard, and feel like I am home. I do not want to placate a landlord, deal with a landlord or beg permission from a landlord. It's too soon. I've waited this long and in all likelihood I will have to wait at least 1 more year, or maybe 2. So, even though the sound of a chick peeping and the sight of a hen dancing across the lawn would cheer and amuse me, I am, unfortunately, too smart to open that door just yet.

Today is take your son/daughter to work day. People at Geoff's office still ask, "How many kids do you have?" I've suggested he offer a different number every time. Keep 'em guessing. Today he will have 3 children, when I drop the boys off this afternoon. Then Maria and I will have the rest of the day alone, together.

I know I said I would not solicit opinions, but I have this 1 question: When is a property a fixer-upper in need of TLC and when is it simply a disaster?


Anna Banana said...

Read If I Ran the Circus again. It's my favorite book from childhood, the book that made (makes) me want to make something out of nothing. That's a Circus McGurkus photo if I ever saw one!

Speaking of photos, Adam broke my camera. Oh dear, I made need to get a replacement for Mother's Day!

Yes, I would wait for chickens. Unless you want the landlord to evict you...could be good?

village mama said...

your pants smell bad, to you, my pitts smell bad, perhaps to others (not me, I kinda dig 'natural'), anyhow, wish we could sniff each other on your property. Love that photo, my vote: it's a 'work-in-progress'. XO

Lesley said...

We owned a house for quarter of a century. Now we rent. It's not that bad being a tenant. My landlord, or his representative, maintains our pool, sends us a weekly team of heroes to do the garden, fixes the plumbing, fixes the air-conditioner, sends help whenever we need it to repair or replace something. Sure it's someone else's asset, and we're paying for it, but it's kind of nice not having the responsibility of all that boring old maintenance. Plus, never forget that San Diego is the most expensive real estate on the planet! The p-l-a-n-e-t! And values are falling as the recession kicks in. Worse looms: it's good to hang fire and wait a while - honest!

Em said...

Natalie, I love hearing your thoughts! I think that picture is a work in progress... I would love to come help you work on it! I wouldn't push the landlord issue right now, but if it's not an issue, then go ahead and get your chicas! I'm dealing with about 35 'landlords' right now... and I OWN my property! Darn city ordinances!!!!

Laura Jane said...

I shouldn't laugh at the thought of your pants (A) smelling bad, or (B) being half your wardrobe - but I did. Should I feel guilty? These things happen, and as you found out they have a solution.

I agree with your non-chicas decision. You actually ARE making some good decisions here, they're just not the progressive (spacious home/land owning) decisions you have waited so long for. Waiting is HARD. REALLY HARD. 'I WANT TO STAMP MY FEET AND SCREAM' HARD somedays! We hear ya!

And that WIP called a yard, sigh. What if you rented a builder's bin and just ditched it all? You guys could use that space. Maybe the landlord would be happy to pay for that! It could feel liberating! - Unless it is YOUR stuff in which case I should just crawl in a hole somewhere...

Keep writing, keep sifting your thoughts... I'll keep reading and loving the questions!

Jennifer said...

The test of a first-rate intelligence is the ability to hold two opposed ideas in the mind at the same time, and still retain the ability to function.

-- F. Scott Fitzgerald

Julie said...

Is that an airstream trailer of to the right in the fixer-upper? Drooling if it is.

We found a large piece of land with a true fixer-upper house -- within walking distance of our current house and we never even knew it was there. Trying so hard not to get our hopes up but I want it!!!!! I am not going to tell you the price because you will just cry.