Monday, June 14, 2010

Ugly Delicious

You may be tempted, but please do not steal the name of our bakery: Ugly Delicious.

I baked this cake.
And I "decorated" it.

How's that for honest?

I mean seriously. Would anyone want to admit that they woke up and decided "I think I will bake a beautiful, tiered cake in honor of my son's birthday. I will make real buttercream frosting and set the cake on a very pretty dish. I will use a pastry bag, so the frosting comes out in lovely flourishes. And I know to be careful about keeping the crumbs out of the frosting… I learned that in the cake decorating class Alex and I took." And then share the hideous results?

Yes, that's right. I took a class to get this good. These are not the results of natural skills alone. This is achieved with time under the tutelage of a professional cake decorator.

Don't blame the professional. She was good.

And it has not escaped my notice, the really important questions: The whys:
Why bake a cake?
Why not let Costco employees do what they were born to do, which is to make big, cheap, delicious cakes?
Why buttercream frosting?
Why not pie?
Why harbor and nurture the fantastically absurd dream of being a clever-lovely-gifted cake decorator? Why?

Clever-lovely-gifted cake decorator?
It is not my destiny. I see that.
But I couldn't just walk away.
I should have walked away.
Other things should have been accomplished… could have been accomplished.

Priorities. It's a word. I should learn it. Then set some.

I am ashamed.
And slightly amused.
And confused… why do I care? Why do I want to make, bake, sew, sow, sing, dance, quote, equate, dictate, lactate, paint, decorate… ? And please, if I am a big achiever, why not set useful goals, like "unpack house," "go to Post Office," "floss," "clean desk?"

William, Alex, Max, and Maria each decorated their own cupcake. The cake-cake we are saving for when Geoff comes home, because he would be really sad if he missed the birthday candle. I think it's like the one Gretchen told me about, and if it works, we are not going to care what the cake looks like. I found it for a lot less at the market. I hope it's not inferior. I am counting on a thrilling, eye-catching cake topper-show stopper!

So, Alex named our bakery. Ugly Delicious. Everything is baked with love, and an honest attempt at beauty, but without any real ability to achieve decorator mastery. And most importantly everything is delicious, and thanks to Trader Joes' dye-free and convenient mix, it was easy to whip-up.


The Words Crafter said...

I laughed all the way through this post!!! Sounds like something I would do, then I would concede defeat and have to eat the "failure" DOES look yummy! The candle is pretty cool, too. Pri-or-it-tes...hmmm...sounds like a word I need to look up... and you're right, emphasis on delicious!

Rois said...

it looks like the cake my husband baked me this year for my birthday and it was Ugly Delicious as well!
Makes me kind of glad that our boys always want doughnuts for their birthdays,which I buy.Could you imagine how Ugly Delicious those could be?
Love your humor BTW.

Julie said...

It looks really, incredibly delicious!!! Seriously, I could poke my finger right into the side of it (if it were possible to poke my finger into a picture of a cake). :)

Happy birthday to the Birthday Boy!!!

CarrieMarie said...

Mmmm...buttercream frosting...!

Janece said...

I LOVE YOU! You are, bar none, the very best!

Beckie said...

Nat de-lish...just like you!!!!!!!!!!!

Chloe said...

Okay, post was so funny! Thanks for sharing this awesome adventure. I'd have done the same thing, and I hope to god that if you had it to do over again, you wouldn't change a thing. The cake is fabulous! ha!

Nemo said...

Im so very very very hungry T0T

Anonymous said...

So, your cake may be UGLY, but that table cloth is SO WAY CUTE!!!!!!!!!!!

I'm visiting for the first time because a) you won the Happy Zombie Holiday Happy fat quarter bundle and I'm SO STINKIN' JEALOUS I just had to see who all these lucky winners were! And b) because the name of YOUR blog was so stinkin' cute I had to check it out. And I see how STINKIN' CUTE you really are!!!!!!

Congratulations...not just for the fat quarter bundle, but for SURVIVING all those animals in your house!!!!!!!! (And I'm NOT just talking about living with 4 MEN, you poor thing! Thank GOD you have a daughter!!!!).


warren said...

Stuf like that never bugs me too much...the first slice taken out and it looks wild anyhow...and never mind the eating and...well, the whole process is about destroying the yours is great!