Sunday, April 25, 2021
Around Here Somewhere
temple, and so I rigged a lanyard to the working temple and to the hinge on the other side, and then I cinch the glasses to my head. I looked in every vehicle, under every bed, beneath chair cushions, behind that thing where I know stuff gravitates, but is dark and embarrassing so I avoid it. I searched all counters, drawers, shelves, and baskets. I searched coat pockets. I questioned the cats. Incidentally, the cats lie, and they withold evidence. I found the furniture pads that we were surprised to be "out of." We weren't out of furniture pads. Someone put them in the entry desk. Probably me. I found the chocolates I bought for Easter, and a package of those small cereal boxes, that people buy when they go camping or move to a new house. Maria's never tried Apple Jacks. I found my favorite crocheted beanie. It's soft wool, and I love to wear it in winter when I go to bed, even though it eventually slips off, which explains why it worked its way down to the floor, beneath our headboard, where it lived with an errant sock, a wayward tissue box, a missing earring, a lone hair tie, and a herd of dust buffalo. I found the bite guard my orthodontist made for me after he removed my braces before I was married... so that would be June 1989. I found my courage... just kidding. Then, at last, I found a pair of glasses... they were wedged beneath and behind the sofa, and the end table, and maybe a dark sock. This pair is one I didn't even think of, neither old, nor broken, but actually intact, functional, not bad looking. Somewhere in this house, are six other pair of glasses, and possibly my courage, which may be in the company of my sanity, and a wild herd of dust buffalo. I blame the cats. Tomorrow I am making an appointment with an optometrist, and then I am going to order new glasses. Geoff is ordering me a lanyard, and he says he is going to add a thing finding device to it, and so I suggested he go ahead and order me the I've fallen and I can't Get Up alarm to add to the lanyard.